Too many of us set resolutions for the new year but never manage to stick to them. Why? Well, maybe it is because we aren't focused on understanding the reasons behind these resolutions.
When we start imagining what we want to achieve, we look towards the end goal as a big, fun, rewarding and exciting result and we don't shine a light on the reasons why we thought about wanting to accomplish these goals.
Without understanding the true source of why we want to set these resolutions, then we will be unable to connect deeply enough with them to make them a reality.
Maybe to be able to accomplish our goals we need to dig down into what the drivers are and find ways to connect with them.
#1 - What’s driving this?
For me, the first step of any big goal or decision I make is understanding which part of me this desire is coming from. Is it my ego? My true self? My smaller self? Or the person I think others want me to be?
Understanding where the drive or motivation comes from will give you a true idea of the intention behind it.
If, for example, the idea comes from the ego you’ll find that, with enough digging, the ego is just trying to fill a void, and therefore, you might not truly resonate with the intention behind the resolution. This in turn makes it easier to give up and quit during the year.
When setting our resolutions we need to connect to our truest intentions. We need to avoid the projections of our smaller self or ego and look towards the progressive and liberating calls that are there to truly help us grow.
#2 - Start Small and Build Big
Being able to stick to a resolution over 365 days takes patience, consistency, awareness and focus.
The biggest mistake people make when setting a resolution is that they will try and make a dramatic change that will impact their daily lives too much. This is where the difficulty occurs in maintaining it.
Setting an extreme new routine or too big a goal is hard to understand and process and therefore it makes it a lot easier to give up because from the outset you are struggling.
What I’ve learnt is to start with a smaller more achievable target, which you can grow into and expand upon. In 2021, I wanted to read more books so I set myself a reading challenge trying to read 10 pages a day. It sounds pretty simple, and it was to start with.
Once I got a few months in I developed a routine which I easily achieved and expanded. I’d gone from reading 10 pages to as many pages as I could in 30 minutes, which was usually between 20-30 pages.
At the end of the year, I’d read 15 books and over 4000 pages. I’d overachieved on my target and developed a new habit which I still look to maintain two years later.
So, if you are setting a new routine to follow or looking to grow your company, remember to be generous with yourself to start with so that you stay in the game longer.
#3 - Don’t Quit at the First Hurdle
How often do you follow an idea or start something new but when you come across the first hurdle you quit? I know I’ve done it several times.
I’ve found two few reasons for why I do this.
The first I mentioned in #1. We don't truly connect with the intention behind the decision to pursue this new goal and therefore when there's difficulty it is easy to give up and move elsewhere.
The second point, which is more relevant for those who have connected with their intention, is simply that we are too hard on ourselves. Our expectations of how things would play out were too rigid and therefore when it doesn't go as we thought, we believe that we are failing and therefore find reason to stop.
The biggest lesson I learnt from any of my routine challenges is that turning up is the main hurdle you have to overcome. It doesn't matter if you have a bad workout or you only read 4 pages one day. You’ve turned up and attempted to do it. That is a win.
Over time, the bad sessions are forgotten because in other sessions you have gone above and beyond.
Remember this. Not every day will be perfect but just make sure you show up every day to attempt to be perfect.
#4 - Track Your Progress
Maintaining momentum can be tough but tracking your progress over time can stimulate you to keep going.
Every 100 days I would tally how many pages I’d read, how many hours I’d been in the gym or how many lengths I’d swam so that I could see the levels of discipline I had developed and the progress I’d made.
Tracking your progress is almost an early reward and should be used to motivate you further and prove that you can accomplish longer-term goals.
Remember:
There are no wrong or right ways to do challenges and the only responsibility you have is to yourself and how committed you are to moving forward and learning more about yourself.
If you have set New Year's resolutions no one, other than you, really cares if you stick to them or not. But that's the point, you should care if you don't stick to them because what are you telling yourself if you don't?
I am Will Flindall, host of the Valley of Outlaws Podcast where I speak to those who have decided to take control of their life and follow a passion or instinct.
If you feel like you could be getting more from your life, then maybe one of the conversations I’ve had with the Outlaws might help you kickstart a change.
Peace x
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