“If you want something you have to take all the responsibility to make it happen.” - Violetta Kitaeva
Responsibility - the state or fact of being accountable or to blame for something.
It can be quite daunting to decide to take full responsibility for your life.
As a child, you grow up with your parents telling you what to do and where you need to be. You then go to school and get told what you need to learn to get to university, where the same happens again for you to be accepted into society and get a job.
Once these stages of life are complete it can be very easy to fall into the pattern of expecting a path to be laid out in front of you again. It is for those who want to take the safe options.
You can easily fall into a graduate scheme or job that gives you a guaranteed income and security without even thinking if you want it.
Our parents want our lives to be safe and consistent and look to give us the best opportunities to grow in these environments. The irony is that we all forget what makes us stronger and wiser is when we are put to our edge and when we are tested with failures and hurdles.
We don't grow to become the best versions of ourselves when we are playing safe, we become the best version of ourselves when we look to understand who we are and take responsibility to chase that and constantly learn.
In the episode with Outlaw #8, Violetta Kitaeva, it was clear that she was someone who had taken responsibility for her life and the future she wanted to have.
Dance formed the majority of her life and became a way for her to grow and experience life. Setbacks or difficulties weren’t seen as so but were merely hurdles to get over to progress to the next stage of her journey.
It is this type of responsibility that I admire because it is one where external influences have little to no impact on the progress someone wants to make.
Taking responsibility for our actions means we become accountable for where we end up. Although this can seem a little overwhelming I find it completely liberating because nothing but my input will dictate my journey and destination.
Regret:
It’s too easy to sit around and complain about how difficult life is and how unfair your life has been. If only you’d had this and that, life could have been so much better. It's a mindset like this that never progresses.
When we realise that we are the creators of our own reality and that we hold the sole responsibility to make our dreams come true life becomes a little bit simpler. We aren't reliant on anyone else influencing and dictating how it will be. It’s down to us to take action.
If we don't manage to get to the stages where we are pushing ourselves to our limits and where we don't test our minds then we could very easily live to regret the opportunity we’ve missed. The opportunity of life.
Don't live to regret the chances you had in front of you to live an extraordinary life filled with failures and successes that enabled you to become the best version of yourself.
Fear:
If I think too deeply about the idea of taking full responsibility for the outcomes in my life it can become quite intense and scary. The fear of responsibility builds and a worry of getting things right the first time leads. This though needs to be squashed and forgotten.
The beauty of life is that we don't need to get things right the first time. Life is not about playing the perfect hand. But, we do need to be able to hold ourselves accountable in moments and take responsibility for the decisions we make. There's a balance to it.
For me, the perfect balance occurs when I take the responsibility to set a direction and a potential endpoint and then I loosen the grip on how I get there. The journey doesn't need to be restrictive, it should just be loosely guided.
My responsibility comes in the form of deciding I want to experience as much as possible and not take the safe moves forward. As long as I follow my instincts and heart I am living up to the opportunity I get of life.
Moving Forward:
I intentionally live my life now knowing full well that the decisions I've made over the last 5 years will dictate a lot of what could happen for me. I've accepted this and am happy with it because the responsibility I hold is focused on living a life that is truly aligned with who I want to be and how I want to live.
If you are at the point where you feel life isn't as exciting or rewarding as you thought it could maybe it's time for you to take more responsibility in making it so. It is all down to you and how you plot your direction of movement.
Listen to my episode with Outlaw #8, Violetta Kitaeva on Spotify or YouTube.
I am Will Flindall, host of the Valley of Outlaws Podcast where I speak to those who have decided to take control of their life and follow a passion or instinct.
If you feel like you could be getting more from your life, then maybe one of the conversations I’ve had with the Outlaws might help you kickstart a change.
Peace x
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